Hello everyone, happy Thursday! Today I decided to write a post about how to maintain a healthy relationship (remember, this is all from my life experience, and my own beliefs. Everyone is different and because we are all unique, the same thing may not work for everyone. I am simply sharing my own thoughts and hoping that it may help others).
- Take time to show & do not just say – A lot of times in long-term relationships we begin to use the words ‘I love you’ very often and sometimes forget the little things that we used to do to show it. We subconsciously may believe that we no longer need to prove our love towards each other because ‘They already know I love them!’ – and yes, your partner most likely does know, but that does not mean you should ever stop ‘proving’ your love to one another. Simple things as phone calls during the day (texting is so over-rated) reminding one another that you miss them and can’t wait to see them at home later, asking each other out to a nice date once in a while, doing the other’s laundry and folding it all nicely on the bed for them to come home to, starting to watch a TV series– that way you two have something to look forward to that you can enjoy together, go on trips and travel together! Making new memories in new territories is an experience you will cherish forever! But my personal favorite , hug each other for 3 minutes every once in a while (my boyfriend and I’s favorite), and allowing yourselves to enjoy each others presence in the now, indulge in their sent, their comfort, the safety you feel in their arms, and all that corny stuff.
Doing things for one another and for each other as a couple does a lot more than just simply stating how much you love and care for one another (although this is nice as well).
- Do not tell someone what their reality is, instead, listen and try to put yourself in their shoes, understand and try to empathize. After all, there is a reason they are feeling what they are feeling and you need to understand everyone has their own perspective and realities. Even though you live, breathe, eat, sleep, and whatever else in the same air, there are two realities to every story.
- Respect-This is HUGE for my boyfriend and I. We DO NOT swear at one another, not even call each other ‘stupid’, we listen to one another, and try not to cut each other off when talking. Cutting these things out of a relationship does WONDERS.Seriously, you begin to form this incredible sense of respect for your loved one and it is a super important habit to get into if you are planning to settle down and have kids with this person as you do not want swearing around the house. Yelling for that matter too, if one of us realizes we are raising our voice, we take a second and calm down, which brings me also to space. Space and some time separated if in an argument is very important and can help avoid so much time and energy. It’s pretty funny at times, if my boyfriend and I fight, we simply take an hour or two to ourselves, and then see each other and just say sorry, kiss, and its seriously awesome. Of course, if something needs talking through we will talk through it, but with a much better head on our shoulders and at a calmer energy.
- Compromise This is big, and pretty self-explanatory, but two people will never agree on everything, compromising is a must! Meet each other half way, talk through different options, and try not to be just black and white, but rather in the gray area, it’s the healthy relationship area!
- Last and most important: Trust– If you do not trust your other half, you either must learn to, or you separate. I’m serious, if you do not have trust for your partner, you will never be full happy and in a healthy relationship. I myself had a very hard time with trust in the beginning of my relationship with my boyfriend due to past experiences. As time went on, I had to just decide that I must change my thought process if I want to be happy, and if I want this to work. This has to go both ways, and needs to be 100%. Five years later, my boyfriend and I are in a very happy place in our lives, and work everyday on all five of these healthy relationship morals we live by. Being in a relationship is one thing, being in a healthy relationship is another.
I hope this post helps even ever so slightly so some people out there!